An Ireland Link for St. Paddys Day

Kathy Ireland, that is...

Props to Barstool Sports for the photos.

6 worst things about seeing a Dropkick Murphys Show

Full disclosure: hyyyuge Dropkick Murphys fan. I've seen them in Boston on St. Paddys Day weekend 6 of the last 8 years. I've seen them rise from very good irish-punk band to a Boston icon. Anyways, without further ado, the 6 worst things about seeing the Dropkick Murphys, in no particular order:

1. Lowell, MA. Sure, they could've played any of the dozens of clubs in Boston and sold them out, but they played Tsongas Arena in Lowell, MA. (home to your Lowell Devils! Woohoo!) Not only were there very few signs telling me how to get there, but the GPS in my car refused to recognize the address or "Tsongas Arena." We had to stop at a convenience store and ask for directions, as the dude spoke to me through the bulletproof glass. We got there late and missed about 20 minutes of the show. And I'm not saying Lowell, birthplace of Jack Kerouac is a shitty area, but Tsongas Arena was on MLK Blvd. Take it away Chris Rock...

2. The awful smell from the moshpit. I'm not expecting a rose-scented mosh pit, but man, you walk in there, and if you're not trying to escape the 6'2 280 lb shirtless meathead who is rubbing up on you, you're trying not to puke after smelling the stench of dozens of dudes who need a shower. Now.

3. Crowdsurfers. New rule: Everyone is allowed to crowdsurf once in your life. It's a cool feeling, and frankly, everyone should be able to say they've done it before. But unless you're under 130 lbs, you don't get to do it again. Ever. By the end of the show, I had some big dudes asking me to pick them up. An unwritten rule of the pit is you always help them crowdsurf when they ask. Fuck that, I told them maybe later.

4. Mohawks. So not only am I dealing with a crazy moshpit, 180 lb mofos crowdsurfing to me from all directions, but now I gotta worry that some kid with a mohawk is going to poke my eyes out? Not cool. And here's my question: these kids with the mohawks, what do they do with their hair the other 350+ days each year when they're not at a punk show? Then they just become some dude with odd hair who, uh, isn't exactly getting a cushy job any time soon with that haircut. Damn, I'm old. And angry.

5. The "Yankees Suck" chants. Really? At a DKM show? You're going to focus on the Yanks and not the band? Oh and guys, one last thing for all of you, now that I'm not surrounded by crazed Massholes: 18-1. Boo ya!

6. The Murphys are now an icon, and not a punk band. The Murphys play some great punk music. They did this consistently for their first 4 albums. But over the course of their last two albums, they've become icons, known for representing the Boston area. As such, they've strayed from simply being a punk band to playing all sorts of odd pop songs, but in a quasi-punk manner. Need further proof?

Compare the New (Tessie)


with the old (The Gauntlet):

(And this doesn't even include DKM's early fans who think they started sucking once about 4-5 albums ago.)

PS:
The following is a text message exchange between me (in Cambridge) and Mahatma (maintaining the SUS empire in Manhattan)
Devo: I forgot how many white people there are in Cambridge.
Mahatma: So says the kettle.
Devo: Touche.

It's a bird! It's a plane! It's Wade Boggs!

This has to be my favorite video of all time. Based on a true story, (Maybe) it's the story of how Wade Boggs traveled back in time to help his good friend Dan Marino win the Super Bowl. It's a bit long, but completely worth it. Enjoy!

Some follow up on Spitzer's goomah

First off, I feel that we at SUS would be failing in our duties as a NY sports blog if we didn't give you Spitzer Chick's Myspace page.

Next props to the good state of New Jersey, for being able to add Kristen to our long list of celebrities. Yup, Springsteen, Bon Jovi, Piscopo, Kristen.

Kristen, as she was known in an FBI affidavit outlining a Feb. 13 tryst with the governor, grew up Ashley Youmans in Belmar and attended Wall High School. She's now an aspiring singer who lives in Manhattan and goes by the name Ashley Alexandra Dupre.

Props to NJ.com, using its Scott Templeton-like journalism skills to write a feature on Kristen's life based on her myspace bio.

Who's Running the Yankees?

Forget the Steinbrenners. According to an article in the New York Times, the Corleones are unofficially running the Yankees. Seriously, the parallels between the two families are simply bizarre.

-George/Vito have had some shady dealings in politics, George with his illegal contributions to Nixon, Vito to apparently everyone. They both have a history of bad acts, from random murders to the constant bickering towards Dave Winfield, but at the end of the day, they’re both beloved by their fanbase/crime syndicate.

-Hank/Sonny is the loudmouth future of the franchise/crime syndicate. They both believe that they have the necessary temperament to own New York, but their arrogance will lead to their demise, with the 39 gunshots at the tollbooth and the comparisons to Jim Dolan. As the oldest brother, they draw the most attention, but they’re not truly the ones to fear.

(And in Hank’s case, there are more obvious parallels to Michael Brown, aka The Artist Formerly Known as Brownie. Both bred horses before being picked for a job which they received because of who they knew. And uh, let’s just say that their encyclopedic knowledge of horse breeding didn’t exactly prepare them for the clusterf#*k that they encountered when placed in the public eye.)

-Hal/Michael aren’t talked about very often, mostly because their brash older brothers steal the headlines, but they are the brains behind the outfit. Both have more education than their brother, whether it’s because they went to college and the army or have an MBA from the University of Florida. Neither says very much, but that’s because neither are plagued by the insecurities of their older brother. They know that their time will come one day when their brother does something foolish and gets killed by Don Barzini or an incensed Yankee fan.

-Fredo/The Steinbrenner Daughters. They’re both part of the family and get to experience the perks of the family money, whether it’s banging cocktail waitress two at a time or simply being a socialite. But because of their sheer stupidity or their gender they were permanently shunned from having any real say in the team. I only hope that Hal doesn’t have the daughters killed on the Steinbrenner yacht once Mama Steinbrenner dies.

-Carlo/Steve Swindal. Not an actual part of the family, and never will be. But whether they helped kill Sonny or committed a DUI and divorce with a Steinbrennerette, they both screwed up really good opportunities.

When White Guys Go Bad

Who among us doesn't like to see Mike Francessa get angry at producers who are making 1/10th of his salary?



Props to Awful Announcing for this



Mike, once the cameras are off: "Hey Eddie, step into my office, because you're f#*kin fired! Oh, and on your way out, can you hand me that Diet Coke. I'd get it, but I, eh, well I'm stuck in the chair, Eddie."


I forget this douche's name, but I've always hated his jerk-off face, his jerk-off attitude, and I hate him, jerk-off whose name I can't remember. Anyways, let's watch him get flustered:



Props to Dlisted and to BH who wasn't too lazy to find this on Dlisted and tell me about it, but was too lazy to post it.