We here at Straight Up Sports want to do our part to celebrate Black History Month the only way that we know how: by talking about the best and blackest show on tv: The Wire.
Part I
The Cops:
Jimmy McNulty (pictured above)
One of the best characters in TV history, up there with Captain Winters of Band of Brothers fame. (Both of these guys are British yet play very American characters, a cop and a captain in the US Army. Something needs to be done about this.) A fantastic detective who only loves drinking and women more than his job. Involved in one of the best drunk driving scenes of all time. He stopped drinking during Season 4 and promptly bored viewers and co-workers alike. Has become certifiably insane this season when due to a lack of city funding, he created a serial killer in an effort to get more funding.
Bunk
McNulty’s old partner in drinking and solving homicides, though more of the former. When McNulty stopped drinking, no one was more bored by new McNulty than Bunk. And yeah, a true friend calls you an asshole when you stop drinking to get your life together.
Lester Freamon
Probably better than anyone in
Kima Greggs
She’d be considered hot if she were simply a female working homicide, even if she looks like a female Hines Ward. Throw in the fact that she’s a lesbian working homicide, and now she’s REAL hot. Props to the shows producers for showing her getting it on with her lady friend. Has spent too much time with McNulty and now she too likes to get hammered and chase women. I hope I work with a woman like this someday.
Ellis Carver
A fast riser, started working the wire with McNulty and co. first season and has now worked his way up to sergeant. One of the few people on this show who actually aspires to be an ethical cop; liked and respected by the community. In Season 4, he fails to protect a snitch from retribution, leading to a scene where the kid mockingly thanks Carver for helping him escape retribution. On a show with at least 25 amazing scenes over 5 seasons, this was my favorite.
Herc
A lousy cop A) because he is somewhat unethical, and B) because he’s just not very good. But he knows how to be in the right place at the right time. When working security for the old Marion Barry-esque mayor, he walked in on him getting Lewinsky-ed. Eventually he left the job and now works for an amazingly unethical lawyer. Props to Herc for making up for the fact that his appearance on Entourage marked the point in which that show jumped the shark.
Colicchio
Basically an asshole. Looks like Jason Varitek. Therefore, Jason Varitek is an asshole. Once again, I REALLY like this show.
Landsman
Started the show as a major kiss-ass in Homicide and is now the Sgt. in charge of homicide. If police work involved looking at nudie mags in his office, he truly would be
Basically a bureaucratic asshole, in the game only to improve his personal rank, which he does until the Mayor shoves him out. I’m pretty sure that they tried to get Charles S. Dutton for the role but he backed out. If he’s going to look like Chuck “You’re 5 foot nuthin’, a hundred and nuthin’” Dutton, they need to make his character much more likeable.
Rawls
Was deputy commissioner and is now temporary commissioner. Hates McNulty with a passion. He’s a lot more fun to watch when he’s in charge of homicide in the first season. Frankly without McNulty, he’s like the NFL without the Patriots or Cowboys: no enemies to make things interesting.
We here at Straight Up Sports realize that, as a family blog, it is not our place to condone drug use. That said, 2 out of 2 SUS Wire-watching-bloggers agree that Sgt. Colvin’s “Hamsterdam” idea to legalize drugs within a small area to make the rest of his district drug-free and amazingly safe is, uh, not the worst idea in the world. Naturally, he was practically crucified for this.
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