If I had to do the 2008 Yankee season over again...

I'd bring Barry Bonds on board. Screw chemistry, he couldn't have hurt it any more than Pudge did down the stretch. And remember that clutch hitting that A-Rod and Jeter never provided? Yeah, Bonds would give that. Well, maybe he wouldn't be Reggie Jackson, but remember when all we needed was another bat or two to provide the offense to complement our pitching? Yup. He would've been the guy.

But Devo, think of the kids! How will I be able to justify to them the idea of rooting for a juicer?

Well, it'll go a little something like this:

Junior: Daddy! I don't want to root for someone like Bonds, a known steroid user.
You: Junior, ya know that Andy Pettite jersey you own? Remember when you cheered Jason Giambi's monster home runs? Well junior, viva Barry Bonds' Yankee career, and viva los steroids!

But Devo, we're the Yankees! Pride! Power! Pinstripes! Tradition! We're the New York Yankees!

To you, ya uppity douchebag, I present Ms. Suzyn Waldman:



And I'm not saying that one moment can ruin someone's career, but Google "Suzyn Waldman." 75% of what you're going to find is related to that date rape of a moment in Yankee history.