Saturday, April 18, 2009

Devo's taking you back to the old school cause he's an old (bald?) fool who's so cool



Some people are going to wax poetic about Lebron this, Kevin Garnett that. Not this guy! Nah, I'm taking you back to the last time that I (and most of this website) actually cared about the NBA. Yeah, we're letting NBA JAM decide this bitch.

Quick Note: The default system will be Sega Genesis. Or as I like to refer to it, the Official Video Game Console of "Devo: The Middle School Years."

Hakeem Olajuwon and Vernon "Mad Max" Maxwell (Rockets)
vs.
Clyde Drexler and Terry Porter (Portland)

Both teams have a Hall of Famer, so let's assume that Glide and The Dream cancel each other out. So it comes down to Mad Max vs. Terry Porter. One guy turned "7 Seconds or Less" into the '94 Knicks, only if the '94 Knicks sucked. The other guy has a badass nickname and was recently jailed for failing to pay child support. To paraphrase Dewey Cox, should you really be forced to support a child you want no part of? I think I speak for 6/8 of SUS when I say, F$*k no! Rockets in 6.

Isiah Thomas and Bill Laimbeer (Detroit)
vs.
Mark Price and Brad Daugherty (Cleveland)

Look, first things first. If 8 years of reading Sports Guy has taught me anything, it's that it would be a mistake to ever bet on Isiah for anything. As if that's not enough, I'm not about to start pulling for the Phil Jackson of the WNBA. Just to top it off Mark Price was probably my favorite small white guy who could knock down 3 pointers so long as they weren't goaltended. Cleveland in 4.

Nick Anderson and Scott Skiles (Orlando)
vs.
Clarence Weatherspoon and Jeff Hornacek (Philly)

Who knew that the most boring actual NBA playoff matchup would be equaled by the most boring NBA Jam matchup? Look, I've heard of all of these guys, and Anderson and Hornacek were good 3 point shooters. But I don't care about any of these guys. Wake me when 'Spoon slaps a ho. Tiebreaker goes to Orlando who had Penny Hardaway in other versions of this game and should have had Shaq but for some licensing issues. Orlando in 5.

2 comments:

Karie T said...

RAZZZZLLLEEE DAZZZLE!!

Anonymous said...

Do You interesting of [b]Female use of Viagra[/b]? You can find below...
[size=10]>>>[url=http://listita.info/go.php?sid=1][b]Female use of Viagra[/b][/url]<<<[/size]

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/30269/link/viagra%2C%20tramadol%2C%20zithromax%2C%20carisoprodol%2C%20buy%20cialis/1_valentine3.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/30269/img0/viagra%2C%20tramadol%2C%20zithromax%2C%20carisoprodol%2C%20buy%20cialis/1_valentine3.png[/IMG][/URL]
[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/30269/link/buy%20viagra/3_headsex1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/30269/img0/buy%20viagra/3_headsex1.png[/IMG][/URL]
[b]Bonus Policy[/b]
Order 3 or more products and get free Regular Airmail shipping!
Free Regular Airmail shipping for orders starting with $200.00!

Free insurance (guaranteed reshipment if delivery failed) for orders starting with $300.00!
[b]Description[/b]

Generic Viagra (sildenafil citrate; brand names include: Aphrodil / Edegra / Erasmo / Penegra / Revatio / Supra / Zwagra) is an effective treatment for erectile dysfunction regardless of the cause or duration of the problem or the age of the patient.
Sildenafil Citrate is the active ingredient used to treat erectile dysfunction (impotence) in men. It can help men who have erectile dysfunction get and sustain an erection when they are sexually excited.
Generic Viagra is manufactured in accordance with World Health Organization standards and guidelines (WHO-GMP). Also you can find on our sites.
Generic [url=http://viagra.wilantion.ru]Viagra 100mg pills[/url] is made with thorough reverse engineering for the sildenafil citrate molecule - a totally different process of making sildenafil and its reaction. That is why it takes effect in 15 minutes compared to other drugs which take 30-40 minutes to take effect.
[b]viagra ukraine
ways to givr viagra
generic viagra fast shipping
can someone on amiloride take viagra
viagra cialis
Viagra In Bulk
quelle dose de viagra
[/b]
Even in the most sexually liberated and self-satisfied of nations, many people still yearn to burn more, to feel ready for bedding no matter what the clock says and to desire their partner of 23 years as much as they did when their love was brand new.
The market is saturated with books on how to revive a flagging libido or spice up monotonous sex, and sex therapists say “lack of desire” is one of the most common complaints they hear from patients, particularly women.