my hotel is not douche proof...

The complimentary hotel body wash here is called "gel de douche". I couldn't make that up if I wanted to. The people at the front desks must sponsor these because they are also huge douches. They tell you that you are being put on hold and being transferred to the concierge and then they hang up on you. This has happened to my girlfriend, "White Girl South Bronx" on three different occasions. Also a douche, the guy driving a lime green corvette down Ocean Drive. Okay we get it, you have more money than us, to quote Devo and Mahatma, CONGRAGULATIONS, YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG! Okay, I'll check in tomorrow evening with my 6 hour diary of NFL Sunday with an AFC east race slant.